Some good stuff I’m loving this week.

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These videos are really good for anyone but especially church leaders and mission’s directors.

(RESTORE videos)

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I’ve said it before. But I love teachers. LOVE them.

This had me all choked up yesterday because it’s so true.

The whole post here.

“Teachers, when you instruct our kids that struggle, I know you have, yet again, patiently pulled up a seat next to their desks, 24 other kids still in the room, and kindly helped them toward mastery. I know you modify, adapt, adjust for their success, which takes so much time and energy. Children with emotional or physical challenges, kids with language barriers and personal turmoil, those who struggle to learn and retain, test and succeed, they require so much of you in the midst of your regular responsibilities, and your patient attentiveness cannot possibly be over-celebrated.”

(Jen Hatmaker)

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Oh…and this from the weekend.

This boy is his father’s shadow at any time possible…

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This is, in fact, not a math equation.

But an example of our daily texts…and an example of why you definitely should name your children with different beginning letters….

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Gabe hit his first home run the other night. I’m sorry…but that is the funnest.

Permanent smile for a good 24 hours.

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Zeke: “It’s going to be a couple busy days, huh Mom?”

Me: “Yep it is.”

Zeke: “You are going to be super tired.”

Me: “Yah. Probably.”

Zeke: “Mom.”

Me: “Yes?”

Zeke: “I love you.”

Um. Seriously. Who is this kid? And how in the world did I get so lucky??

I’ve been reading a lot lately.

It’s been grand.

But I have noticed a bit of unsettling in my spirit.

I am one of those people who desperately wants to get it “right.”

I’ve said before that I am a rule follower to a fault.

So as I am sorting through and trying to reconcile the variety of perspectives and interpretations on my kindle, I have felt myself getting a little stressed.

So today I decided to settle my heart and mind on one thing.

I love the way Manning says this.

So this morning, I took a walk and committed to meditating…yes, I’m trying that…meditating on only this:

“He is not moody or capricious; He knows no seasons of change. He has a single relentless stance towards us: He loves us.”

When I felt my mind start to wander, I brought it back here.

Only here.

Not to mention that this is my backyard and where my morning walk took me:

It was good.

Andy is at a conference (his favorite) this week.

And we have clearly mastered the art of covering all important issues in 30 words or less….

And I did.

It is.

Beautiful here today.

We are at an interesting season in our lives.

I can’t quite articulate it yet.

I feel like I’m floundering a bit.

But I’m OK with that for now.

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Here’s a couple things I am owning this week:

1. I miss people. I miss the comfort of friendships where you show up unannounced, and feed your kids together, and spend hours upon hours every single week together. I’m starting to wonder if that was a season too that has simply passed.

That’s OK. I just miss it.

2. I made these. That was a good choice.

3. Money. It’s just frustrating. That’s all.

4. I am crazy, crazy fond of these people that live with me.

Found these in the archives.

This one in particular confirming that we have in fact always been stellar parents…

Sometimes we feel so inadequate to parent these new teenagers. It’s a whole new world.

We have no idea what we are doing.

But in all honesty, we never had any idea what we were doing.

It just feels like the stakes are so high these days.

Each season brings new joys and new challenges.

I’m thankful for them all.

And yes…sometimes I miss this…

Seriously…too much…

We are logging our hours this week in the stands.

It’s a little chilly…and so stressful (baseball is so stressful to me)…and so much fun.

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A hard week on many levels.

I appreciated this from Anne Lamott:

“There is amazing love and grace in people’s response to the killings. It’s like white blood cells pouring in to surround and heal the infection. It just breaks your heart every time, in the good way, where Hope tiptoes in to peer around. For the time being, I am not going to pretend to be spiritually more evolved than I am. I’m keeping things very simple: right foot, left foot, right foot, breathe; telling my stories, and reading yours. I keep thinking about Barry Lopez’s wonderful line, “Everyone is held together with stories. That is all that is holding us together; stories and compassion.”

The never-ending rainfall cancelled most of our weekend games.

Which made for an unusually calm weekend.

The rainfall did not, however, cancel church.

This was my crew after our post-church sprint to the car…

I just like them. They are so fun.

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In other news–

The cast is clearly doing a great job of slowing this one down…

He’s counting the days until it comes off.

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This has helped my Monday.

Might of done it for breakfast.

And lunch.

I mean…sometimes….it just works.

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Brennan Manning passed away yesterday.

It was a bit surreal for someone I didn’t know but whose work has so profoundly impacted my life.

” In the last few years, nearly blind, subject to illness and falls, at an age when he should have been enjoying retirement on a beach in Florida, he kept getting on airplanes and flying places to proclaim a Gospel he believed with all his heart but could not always live.”

–Yancey on Manning (full article here.)

I did a quick search of my own blog to see the countless times I have quoted him here.

And I join the chorus of people whose faith has at some point been saved by his words.

I am incredibly grateful for his ragamuffin courage.

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“I am being told anew in the unmistakable language of love, ‘I am with you, I am for you, I am in you. I expect more failure from you than you expect from yourself.” (Manning)

“He is not moody or capricious; He knows no seasons of change. He has a single relentless stance towards us: He loves us.” (Manning)

This is really powerful. I loved watching the sincere interaction between this young lady and her Mom.

You don’t hear many adoption stories from Sierra Leone. This is pretty cool.

The video shown at the beginning, you can see it more clearly here.

And then watch the interview starting at about minute 5.

I’ve always said it. I go to these conferences for the “spaces in-between.” For the conversations that happen in the hallways and late into the night. For the rawness that comes from time away from the routine and the vulnerability that comes from a room filled with women who to some extent or another truly understand.

I go for those.

Some of my very best in-real-life friends were born out of those moments. (Neely–remember when we skipped the whole afternoon of breakouts at that first conference??)

So from this last weekend:

1. I laughed. A lot. More than I have in a long time. I roomed with long-time and precious friend, Amanda. And I met my other roommate, Celina, on the drive from the airport. And I loved her. Like really, really liked her. We wasted little to no time on small talk. I appreciate that. And I was so thankful for those two and how they magically could turn the deepest, darkest of discussions into uncontrollable laughter.

2. Every time I walked past Angela, I had the overwhelming urge to hug her. We didn’t resist. She’s one of those sweet friends that is always a delight to be around. And I was just SO happy to be in her company again.

3. And I do think that every time Jennifer and I had a conversation…some only a few minutes long…I was crying. She’s that friend that sees instantly beyond the surface. I always want to process life with her and keep a mental list of things to talk to her about. And apparently I cry a lot around her. It’s the healing kind of tears. I love her.

4. Lisa, a long time hero of mine, shared her story…again with such honesty and clarity. I have so appreciated the couple of times we have gotten to share. She to me is a calming force…honest with the struggles, but settled and articulate in her hope. I love that about her.

5. My sweet friend, Kathleen, who I know from Seattle but get to hang out all too rarely with was there too. I want to sit at her feet for like 3-4 hours every single day. She loves so well. She is unassuming. And I want to be like her when I grow up.

6. Tisha is a beautiful writer. And she shared her heartbreaking story with such courage. I know her and love her and I knew she didn’t really want to do it. I’m so glad she responded in obedience. The conversations that took place long into the night as a result of the wrestling she forced us to do…I loved that. I’m not a fan of pat answers. She didn’t have any. I liked that.

7. Julie shared her story as well. Julie is another met-at-conference-turned-into-a-real-life-friend person. She is a relentless encourager and I can’t really express how much I appreciate that about her. She talked about being a control freak adoptive mom–which we all know is an oxymoron.

8. Lisa and Terina and their team were spectacular. It was a first time event for them and from my perspective, it was seamless. Every detail was perfectly executed. I was genuinely so, so impressed.

9. Amanda gave a great breakout on the Trust Based Parenting…and every parent should come back to Karyn Purvis and her insight at least once a year..or once a day. I needed it and Amanda was genius at presenting the material. So practical and I know it left so many Moms feeling hope for the first time and empowered with practical tools.

10. I so appreciated the time with Tara and her perspective as an adult adoptee. Such an important voice. Her challenge to change parenting perspective to discipleship was powerful.

11. I got to meet Mary Kay–who I have been email friends with for YEARS. She was part of the beginnings of Water for Christmas and has always, always been a source of life for me over the years. I was so thankful for the opportunity to hug her!

12. And the conversations…with Jen (I’ll never forget the bus story!), and Erika (5 boys, one girl and some hope for parenting teenagers), and Gina (well, I know a lot about Gina. Not blog appropriate), and Karen (she has three 9 year olds and I could tell I just touched the surface of her wealth of wisdom), and Bethel (another mom offering perspective on teenagers and I was so touched by their radical obedience), and Amy (I’m pretty sure I didn’t get enough of her and hope to have more time in the future) and Michelle (now that we met in real life friend and she lives in Seattle, she is on my hit list of people to force to be my friend.) They were all a gift.

13. It’s a true story that I was trying to escape all weekend before my Sunday morning talk. I just felt so inadequate. I mean…really. I was in a room of superheroes. These women. Are. Superheroes. I was pretty sure I was the wrong person to use the microphone. Each and every time I had a hallway conversation with someone, I thought, “They need the microphone. That’s incredible.”

I kept wanting to change the talk I had come with. To take things out. Make something up that would make it better.

You’ll be glad to know, I resisted the urge to lie. Yay me.

I also resisted the urge to run. Or actually, Amanda wouldn’t let me. She hid the keys.

So I went with the talk I came with…which was simply my story because that’s all I have. And honestly, I was settled in it by the time it began.

My prayer was that if I told our story anything like right, everyone would be able to find their own story. And God would make himself known in and through our stories.

I can’t really say if it was successful for anyone else…but I can say that the process of sitting in my story, of telling it, of recognizing where we have come from…was important for me.

And I was thankful.

14. All four speakers requested that the sessions not be recorded. It was one of those weekends. You’ll have to come next time.

15. And I came home feeling healthier. I don’t let the tears flow often enough. I don’t laugh enough.

16. I was beyond excited to get home to my husband and kids. That’s always a good sign.

17. And I’ve missed all these precious women. I really have. I think that’s good too.

18. My lists are so annoying. Sorry.

19. Real quick–I do think that if you really, really don’t feel like coming….you should. You just should. I’ll meet you in the hallway.

20. Adoption is beautiful. It is a miracle. It truly is. Orphan care/orphan prevention work is beautiful, truly beautiful.

Adoption is also really, really terrible. So. much. grief. And orphan care/prevention opens your world to really, really terrible stuff.

And it’s OK. You are not alone.

Don’t be afraid. He’s got this. He’s got you.

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“Grief is not something to be fixed. It is something to be borne, together.”

(Melton)